


Holding a Heart

by goldtoashes, heirsofbrokenlegacies (jarofhearts)



Series: Making the most of loving you [7]
Category: TOLKIEN J. R. R. - Works & Related Fandoms, The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: "Hunting Trips" as a Poor Excuse for Sexual Getaways, Everything is Beautiful and Nothing Hurts, First Time Blow Jobs, Fluff with a subtle hint of Foreshadowing, Hand Jobs, M/M, Romance, Sexual Experimentation, Sexual Tension, Soul Bond, Soulmates, True Love, Years of the Trees, Young Love, adventurous!Fingon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-16
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-14 11:28:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28794678
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldtoashes/pseuds/goldtoashes, https://archiveofourown.org/users/jarofhearts/pseuds/heirsofbrokenlegacies
Summary: Maitimo and Findekáno leave Tirion for a hunting trip on Maitimo’s begetting day. How fortunate for Valinor's wildlife, then, that in truth neither were interested in engaging in an actual hunt.
Relationships: Fingon | Findekáno/Maedhros | Maitimo
Series: Making the most of loving you [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2034202
Comments: 8
Kudos: 36





	Holding a Heart

There’s a bliss in new beginnings that can hardly be surpassed by anything that comes later. Or at least that’s how it always was for me. The opportunity of something foreign to explore, the marvel in setting my feet on new paths has always thrilled me, and of course, nothing has ever been as thrilling as those first months and years together with Nelyo. A blissful, careless time in the Noontide, unclouded by the shadows of later days.

I remember clearly how I yearned for the times when we were together and how impatient and restless I felt when we were not - although we were never really apart for long in those days. It certainly felt like forever, though, especially when Fëanáro would take his sons on one of those long trips throughout Aman. Irissë would always claim that I was an obnoxious mess when Nelyo was away and that she was surprised that no one else would notice. And though I’d still insist that she exaggerated by far, I cannot deny that I would feel exhilarated, almost giddy when he would finally, finally return.

 _I can’t wait to see you,_ I sang in my head while rummaging through the pantry, carelessly tossing bread, cheese, some leftover crumb cake and whatever else looked tasty into the bag I had packed for the day. Not that I actually felt hungry for food right now, my stomach tumbling as if a thousand butterflies were trapped in it.

Even though it was still a new sensation, the feeling of our bond thrumming between us with Nelyo’s thrilled anticipation of seeing me again so soon had already become as familiar as breathing. Like we had always been bonded.

 _Me neither_ , he let me know amid a wave of affection.

“Here, I know what else you need to pack,” my sister’s voice interrupted my happy musings. Without me noticing, she must have snuck up on me, because she was there now, next to me, reaching up over my shoulder to pluck a bottle of linseed oil off the pantry shelves and present it to me with an expression full of delight.

“Shut up, you sneaky brat!” I threw an apple at her head that of course she evaded, giggling and ducking out of my reach. “What are _you_ doing, stalking me?”

“Why would I do that?” Rissi grinned, unapologetic, and shook the bottle in my face. “Come on, you know you want it!”

“Linseed oil?” I raised my eyebrows and gave the bottle in her hand a critical look. “No, I think I’ll pass. But if you’re so concerned about my well-being, let me inform you that I have already packed a generous vial of sandalwood oil.” I gave her a wide grin, pretending to be lost in the memory. “It smells absolutely wonderful and feels even better on your skin. And I don't know how this works, but it even warmed up when Nelyo poured it all over my -”

“Ew, vile!” she laughed and gave my shoulder a shove to make me stop talking. “I was only looking out for you and that’s how you show your gratitude?”

“Why, yes,” I gave back, the smirk on my face belying the puzzled tone of my voice. “I just don’t want there to be any secrets between me and my most beloved sister and confidant.”

In fact, Irissë was the only one who knew about Nelyo and me so far. Not because I had decided to tell her. But she had always been aware of my feelings for him and had put me on the spot when we had returned from our yearly outing to the lake, asking whether the stupid grin on my face meant what she thought it did. Nelyo might have been able to talk his way out of it without stammering and flushing all over, but I wasn’t blessed with a silver tongue like my husband.

She rolled her eyes at me and put the bottle of linseed oil back onto the shelf.

“Is that your present for Maitimo then? A ‘hunting trip’ you get to spend undisturbed in the woods together?”

“That, and I might have some other surprises planned.”

“Do I even dare ask?”

“Better not.” I suggestively raised my eyebrows and let her imagine the rest.

Rissi let out a sound that was half laugh, half disgust, and strolled along the shelves. Before the woven basket with the peaches, she stopped, picked one up, and rubbed her thumb over its fuzz. “How long have they been gone again?”

“Three months,” I said, “and are you really going to pretend you didn’t know exactly how long they’ve been gone?”

I would have known that she did by the way she was studying her peach for a moment longer before nonchalantly taking her first bite. “Mmhhh. You think he’s been missing you just as much? That husband of yours?”

“I _know_ he has,” I said pointedly and couldn't help but add, “One of the many benefits of being bonded, you know?”

“There are more?” The way she crooked her eyebrows at me underlined the disbelief in her voice.

“There are, but admittedly, several fall in the category you just described as _vile_ in your youthful ignorance,” I continued teasing her. “Come on now, as if you aren’t excited to see Tyelko again. I can see right through you, little one.”

This time, she flat out rolled her eyes at me. “I can have that without being bonded. In case you hadn’t noticed that I’ve _grown up_ …”

“Hard to miss, you’re as tall as I am by now,” I grumbled. “Seriously, someone must have fed Turko and you with something that no one bothered to give to me.”

With an innocent but very pleased look on her face, Rissi shrugged and pointedly flipped her hair over her shoulder. “Well then! I’ve done my duty, made sure you’re all set for a romantic getaway. I will leave you to your preparations, brother dearest,” she said with a wink and a smile, and had slipped out of the pantry as quickly as she had come.

I huffed loudly, hoping that she might still hear it and wondering briefly why it was that she tried to avoid the subject of Tyelko every time I attempted to bring it up. While I admittedly had a not always easy relationship with him that oftentimes resembled more of a rivalry, it was obvious to me that my sister was smitten with him - and yet holding back. Regardless, I decided not to concern myself with it today. Today was reserved for me and Nelyo only.

I finished packing as quickly as I could and then hurried to get out of the house and through the streets of Tirion to where the outskirts of the city gave way to the lush meadows where our horses dwelt. It was a beautiful day which, unfortunately, meant that there were many other elves around. And so even though my heart instantly beat faster in my chest when I made out his tall figure, I kept myself from running up to him and throwing myself into his arms the way I wanted to. It didn’t keep me from flashing him the brightest and most stupid grin possible, however.

The impatiently brimming bond between us flared up with warmth, brighter and warmer than Laurelin’s light even up close. Nelyo was smiling at me, and there was joy in his grey eyes that was unbridled, that told me that if he could have, he would have run to me just as I would have to him.

“All packed and ready to go?” he spoke up once I was close enough, just as another congratulations was called out to him from one of the other elves spending time out here with the horses. I could not make myself glance over to identify him even briefly. But Nelyo, of course, tore his gaze away, tipped his head and called back his thanks, yet I could feel the impatient longing pulsing between us.

“All ready,” I replied although I felt as if I would burst the next moment, “except for one thing, of course.” And with that, I pulled him close into a warm hug, the sheer intensity of being able to smell and touch and be near him again almost rendering me speechless for an alarming moment.

“Happy begetting day, dearest cousin,” I finally managed to say half-loud, and I believed that my voice sounded _almost_ casual.

I knew that I was not alone in what I was feeling by how firmly yet tenderly Nelyo held me close to him, turning his face into my hair. When he spoke, his voice was soft, so soft that only I could have heard the whisper he gave me in return.

“Thank you, my love.”

“I missed you,” I whispered back before slowly and very hesitantly withdrawing from his embrace. Nelyo and I were known to be close, so there was nothing unusual about us hugging or touching - but there was a thing such as _too close_ , of course.

“Let’s get the horses, shall we?” I asked louder, adding in my mind, _I can’t wait to finally be alone with you._ “And you need to tell me all about your trip.”

Our gazes met, and there was a wordless heat in them that tingled all the way down my spine, shared impatience, joy and a promise. I must not have been the only one to feel it, because Nelyo abruptly turned to face the plains stretching away from the city. The breeze carried his clean, melodic sound of a long whistle, the notes calling to Turcanna and Vórimo. I added my own to reach out to Larciel, and when I stopped, I could feel Nelyo’s eyes on me again.

When I glanced over, there was an intense look in them, as though I was the most wondrous thing he had ever turned his eyes on. I could feel my face heating up at that gaze, promising unspoken delights. I had seen that particular look in his eyes often enough, mostly when I was already dizzy with the sheer pleasure from the touch of his hands and lips. And of course he knew right away where my mind was straying and it only added fuel to his fire. 

Only when I heard the familiar neighing of our horses, I managed to look away, just stating the first thing that came to mind. “Stars, Vórimo has grown since I last saw him.”

“He has.” There was pride in Nelyo’s voice when he raised his hand to stroke through the mane of the foal, who looked indeed more like a yearling now and was nearly the size of his mother. Vórimo snorted happily and nudged his head against Nelyo’s chest. I couldn’t take my eyes off them, so of course Nelyo caught me at it. A smile widened on his face.

_You look very fetching with that blush._

I tried to keep my countenance, though by the feeling of warmth on my face, said blush even intensified at his words. Except for his ardent gaze, Nelyo managed to look perfectly casual and relaxed as always, the perfect image of a handsome Noldor prince riding out for a hunt with his best friend. I always thought he looked best like this, dressed in simple leathers and hunting gear, his glorious auburn hair loosely tied together at the back of his neck.Larciel impatiently nudged me with her nose and I cleared my throat. “Well, we should get going if we still want to be fortunate today.”

“Let’s,” Nelyo agreed, and we jumped onto Larciel’s and Turcanna’s backs with a happy urgency that was picked up by our horses who fell into a joyful gallop without either of us having to urge them into it. Vórimo, I realized quickly, followed us only for a few paces before losing interest and trotting off instead - yet another sign of how much he had grown, not just in height.

For a while, we let our horses roam free, exchanged smiling glances and heartfelt laughs, a current running through our bond of excitement and relief of finally being back in each other’s company. As though everything was a little brighter, a little warmer, now that we were together again.

Eventually, our faithful companions slowed down and fell into step next to each other. I felt as though drunk on too much sweet wine.

“Has it really been only three months?” Nelyo spoke up then, his eyes on me once more. “It felt like so much longer.”

“I wholeheartedly agree,” I said, patting Larciel’s neck and adding on an afterthought, “I liked that I could feel you, though. Especially those times when I knew you were thinking of me too.” 

Of course those moments had more often than not resulted in me eventually seeking the touch of my own hand. But I didn’t have to mention that, because naturally, he _knew._ And the look on his face said as much, eyebrows rising subtly.

“It must have indeed been comfortable, to be able to retreat to your private chambers whenever you felt like it,” he said pointedly, the corners of his mouth twitching.

“Hm. I guess so,” I beamed, not even pretending to sound apologetically. “So… I trust your trip was quite exciting, then?”

Nelyo laughed, soft and indulgent, and fondly shook his head. “You certainly spiced it up whenever it was convenient or inconvenient. Earned me more than one puzzled look, I will have you know.”

I felt vaguely satisfied at that. Even though I had agreed to keep our marriage a secret for now and there was a certain thrill in sneaking around our respective families, there was also a part of me longing for the day that everyone would know Nelyo was mine, and mine alone. 

“You wouldn’t think that a trip with all your brothers would need much spicing up,” I joked gently, not willing to linger on the thought for too long. “Come on, give me some gossip, beloved. What was the worst thing that happened and who did it?”

“The worst?” He laughed. “Don’t ask me to betray my brothers’ trust like that if you will only tease them mercilessly for it. But know that we have been back to the mining site I told you about, and used it as an example for the planning of a city. There were about as many shenanigans and missteps as you can imagine.”

“Planning a city?” I raised my eyebrows. “But… your father isn’t really planning to leave Tirion, is he?” 

I spoke lightly, yet I couldn’t help a sudden feeling of unease at the thought. And it wasn’t quelled at all when Nelyo took a beat longer to reply than I had expected him to.

“I can’t imagine that he is.” The smile he gave me, nevertheless, was reassuring. “He hasn’t said anything to indicate it.”

“But why would he want to plan a city with you, then?”

“He thinks it’s part of a comprehensive education.”

It did sound like something Fëanáro would come up with just for educational purposes. And yet… 

“All right, then. But don’t even get any ideas, there’s no way I’ll let you get away again so soon.” I gave him a broad grin, although my words were spoken only partly in jest.

To my relief, there was an utterly tender expression on his face as he looked at me.

“Oh, you could not keep me away if you tried. Stars, I need to touch you desperately.”

His words were sufficient to make my heart beat faster and I had to keep myself from reaching for him right away. But I was determined not to be the one to rush at him today as I was prone to. So instead, I just gave the trees around us an indecisive look. “Hmm… we’re still rather close to the city, though. Someone could head our way, and given you just told me how much you would value some _privacy_ …”

A spark of heat flared up through our bond. “I’m sure you would agree with me that some privacy, valued as though it will always be, would not be needed so desperately if you were more capable of keeping yourself quiet.”

Oh, how I had missed this, missed _him._

“Right. Look at me and tell me again how you’d like me to be _more quiet_ when you’re making love to me.”

I knew I had hit the mark when a grin broke out over his face.

“Then we should best be riding harder again, should we not?”

I grinned and urged Larciel on without further comment, though this time the wind was not sufficient to cool the hot surge of anticipation in my body. We rushed deeper and deeper into the woods until we had to slow the horses due to the thickness of the forest’s underbrush and the uneven terrain. Lush green grass and white wildflowers grew everywhere and I heard the slow gurgling of one of the small streams that meandered through the woods. The water surface was shimmering in Laurelin’s golden light. We had met here before and knew the place to be highly secluded, yet I did not dismount right away.

“What do you think,” I mused, tilting my head. “How loud would I need to be for them to hear me back in Tirion, hm?”

With the softest of footfalls, Nelyo landed in the grass covering the forest floor. “Get off your horse,” was all that he said, eyes bright and intense and never leaving me.

“Is that an order, Your Highness?”

“Do you need to have it spelled out for you?” he raised his eyebrows, but the corners of his mouth were twitching and a few steps brought him right up to Larciel’s side.

“Don’t bother,” I purred and threw my leg over Larciel’s neck to slide down in a fluid motion, right into his waiting arms. Wrapping my own around his shoulders possessively, I effectively prevented any reply with my lips heatedly pressing onto his. 

_Finally. Oh love, I missed you so much._

I could feel the same sentiment thrumming through our bond, making me feel beautifully lightheaded. My feet never even met the ground as he held me lifted with one arm around my waist and a hand under my thigh.. He kissed me just as I had imagined he would, after such a long time of having to go without it: a little desperate, very overwhelming, but still as reverent as always. I wrapped my legs around his strong body and for a few blissful moments just let him take the lead. And admittedly, it was tempting to just go along as I had done every single time so far when we had met in secret, but I dizzily remembered that I had some other plans for today. And so, when he eventually put me down onto a soft patch of grass at the riverbend, I pulled him down just to shift my weight and reverse our positions so that he was on his back with me straddling him.

“I think I owe you a begetting day present, dearest husband,” I muttered and smiled down at him while already reaching for the fastenings of his shirt. There was surprise in his eyes as he looked from my face to my hands and back and a soft laugh escaped him.

“Oh? And what is it you have in mind, little prince?”

I couldn’t help the little shudder that ran through me at the endearment that never failed to make my knees weak. Good thing I was not on my feet anymore. 

“Well, I was thinking… since you already mentioned my alleged incapability of keeping quiet…” My fingers made quick work of the fastings and I slid my hands under his shirt to push it upwards. When I pulled the fabric over his head, I leaned in to whisper in his ear, my own heartbeat loud in my ears, “I could keep my mouth occupied for a start. If you like.”

There was a flash of surprise that I could feel, and then a heat that was mirroring in my husband’s eyes. I could see his throat move as he swallowed, his gaze so intense as he watched me, never blinking.

“Is that what you _want_ to do?”

Sensing both his arousal and hesitation, I chose my next words carefully. “Mhm… you made me feel so good when you did it for _me_.” I pressed a kiss to his jaw and made sure he sensed how even the memory of his bright copper, unbraided hair tumbling over my trembling thighs was sufficient to set my blood into motion. “I thought I’d return the favor.”

His hand came up to cup my cheek, and before I knew what was happening, he was kissing me, long and deep. I was breathless by the time he drew back just enough to tip our foreheads together.

“Don’t ever feel like you need to repay me, for _anything_ ,” he stressed, his eyes searching mine. “It was my pleasure. But if you truly do want to, I would be ecstatic to have you.”

“I’m glad to hear,” I muttered, my hands already busy travelling down his chest and to the fastening of his breeches. “Because I truly _want_ to pleasure you… and also to put an end to you being the only one able to boast with his exceptional skills as a lover,” I added with a mischievous smile and felt a swell of pride when it made him laugh.

“No need to boast, you already are exceptional,” Nelyo grinned at me, thumb brushing over my cheek. He did not try to stop me though, and raised his hips accommodatingly when I tugged on his breeches.

“I have to be, or how else would I ever be a suitable match for you?” The urge to throw myself at task at hand was overwhelming, but I held back for another moment to just admire his body stretched out before me on the grass, his long, strong limbs, the shapely proportions, the soft swell of muscle under pale skin.

“Well-formed indeed,” I said softly, my fingers caressing the inside of his thigh.

“Fin…” he murmured, and I could not tell even over our bond whether it was bashful or tender. What I _did_ know was that he was hard, from my attention, soft touches and glances alone. It gave me a heady feeling and a good idea why it was that he enjoyed it so much to pleasure me. 

“My Russo,” I gave back affectionately, feeling how my breeches suddenly felt far too tight as well. I shifted down from his legs so I got to kneel between them, my heartbeat suddenly caught in my throat. To distract myself, I pressed a couple of soft kisses to the inside of his thigh. 

“You still remember the times when you did this for me, don’t you?” I muttered against the skin. “I thought I’d go mad with pleasure before you had even started in earnest.” My fingertips were dancing over his length as fleetingly as the caress of butterfly’s wings.

Oh, I could get used to this, and to the rush of satisfaction when there was a bit of a wobble in Nelyo’s voice when he said, “I would never forget.”

“So… has it occurred to you that maybe I would indeed try to repay you?” I teased. Another touch, another fleeting caress, hot breath over sensitive skin. “Give you a little taste of your own medicine and take my sweet revenge?”

“Hm…” It was so interesting and thrilling to hear how the quality of his voice was changing. It was subtle but, to me, very clear. “Considering how much you always seem to enjoy yourself… I can only be in for a good time, right?” Nelyo laughed quietly, breathlessly, his hand coming up to slide gentle fingers through my hair.

“ _Enjoy_ myself…” I paused, tilted my head and gave him a taunting look. “What an eloquent way of stating I ended up as a panting, spluttering mess every single time…”

The smile on his face widened into a grin. “Is that what you want to reduce me to? A panting, spluttering mess?”

“At least I’ll give it my best shot,” I said amiably, and before he could give me another clever reply, I turned to the task at hand and took him into my mouth.

The one thing that happened instantly was that he gasped. A soft, quiet sound, but one that told me how much he hadn’t expected it to feel the way it did, how it made his heart stutter and the muscles in his stomach tighten. It was sufficient to send a surge of heat through my own body that made me once again curse the fact that I had been too impatient to remove my own uncomfortably tight breeches before getting into this. No way to fix it now without stopping, however, which was the last thing on his mind. 

Despite my own arousal, I deliberately made myself go slow at first to simply get used to the feeling. I tried to figure out what it was that Nelyo liked, and what would draw more of those beautiful little gasps and moans from his lips. Which in itself was an exciting endeavour, given how composed I normally knew him to be. But now, he gave me all the responses I was looking for, in the way he moved, sounded, or through encouraging little murmurs or suggestions.

After a while, I gave him a teasing glance from below.

_So, husband, how am I doing?_

It took quite a few heartbeats longer than usual until I received an answer.

“An attentive and gifted student as always,” Nelyo eventually said out loud with a rougher note to his voice than it usually had, his body on the grass pliant and open as I had rarely seen it. Maybe because I was succeeding in taking the work off him, allowing him to be able to not think about everything he was doing for once. I was impressed by the fact that he still managed to form a coherent sentence at this point, yet his words prompted me to try and jostle his composure a little further. Softly humming around his length to show him how much I approved of the praise, I increased the pace and let my hand trail down his thigh and between his legs to explore. I remembered how amazing it had felt last time when he had me in the same position and the low sound of pleasure from his lips pointed me into the right direction.

_Tell me more about it._

It was a mischievous sort of request, designed specifically to tease and draw him out. And I had to hold myself back from grinning when his pause was even longer this time and I could feel the trembling strain in the muscles of his thighs and stomach as he tried not to shift too much.

“I’m not sure -” Nelyo began, then seemed to rearrange his thoughts. “Stars, I can understand why you -” _Do that again, please, there…_ “It feels _so good_ …”

_Easy love, I’ve got you._

I reached out for him on an impulse, a gentle, reassuring brush of our minds. And yet… to hear and feel his composure fall apart like this was the sweetest treat I could have asked for and it just fuelled my own arousal. I didn’t slow down or try to draw it out any further, probably couldn’t have even if I had wanted to. Each twitch of his muscles, each gasp from his lips was an encouragement to go faster, take him deeper. I nearly forgot to breathe over it and started to feel a little lightheaded.

Like that I all but missed the way he murmured my name, but I had no chance of missing the urgency that was spilling over through our bond, the clearest sign that my husband was teetering on the edge. And it didn’t take more than a little encouraging nudge from me - _just let go -_ for him to tense and then fall back with a deep, relieved sigh. I stilled and swallowed, my hand brushing his hip in a tender caress, before I looked back up again. A stupidly broad grin spread all over my face and I couldn’t help but feel ridiculously proud of having worn him out like this, his physical satisfaction still thrumming lazily within our bond.

He only gave himself a brief moment of respite, however, before he blinked back at me and smiled at, undoubtedly, the look on my face.

“Come here,” he murmured, and I instantly crawled into his outstretched arms, happily nuzzling close when he pressed a kiss to my lips. “That was incredible. Thank you, my love.”

“It was my utmost pleasure,” I returned and gently nibbled on his lower lip. “Stars, Nelyo, you should have _heard_ yourself…”

He laughed softly, almost bashful, and tipped his forehead against mine. “You sound very satisfied with it.”

“Well, what can I say,” I replied in a husky tone of voice that betrayed my pending arousal. “I suppose I just like having you inside of me either way.”

I could feel that a laugh was almost bubbling out of him, would have, probably, if he hadn’t kissed me again right then. With his arm around my shoulders, he pulled me in, and just a small shift of our bodies later, I felt his hand work on the front of my breeches.

 _Do you want me to return the favour?_ I heard him across our bond. And while a small part of me considered to modestly decline and state that _of course you don’t need to, love,_ my body had clearly decided that it had waited long enough. My hips were impatiently bucking against his hand before he had even done anything. The fleeting touch was sufficient to remind me of how painfully hard I was, and thus, the only sound that escaped my lips was an embarrassed little groan into his shoulder. 

“I will take that as a yes,” Nelyo chuckled warmly, undeniably confident as he quite literally took matters back into his own hands. And I would have to admit that he had the easiest of times with me, considering how keyed up I already was. He knew so well what he was doing with me by now that he had me shuddering and gasping after only a dozen expert strokes. With a soft moan, my body collapsed in his arms and my mind followed his own into the same state of relief and lazy, thrumming satisfaction.

We rested together like this in a quiet, sated sort of peace, his heartbeat under my ear, a soft kiss being pressed into my hair, the softest of breezes ruffling the foliage overhead.

“This was not what I had expected for our reunion,” Nelyo finally murmured, a clear smile audible in his voice.

“Mmh... What _did_ you expect, then?” I smiled without bothering to open my eyes.

His chest vibrated under me as he laughed quietly. “I think you know what I mean.”

I hummed, my fingertips gently caressing his stomach. Admittedly, it had been different than the other times we had lain together.

“Did you -” I started, pausing to rephrase the question in my head. That he had _liked_ it was obvious, his pleasure still radiating through our bond, but I was curious about something else. “Would you like me to do it again? Not now, I mean, but - sometime?”

I could feel surprise mingling into his post release bliss, and his curious eyes on me. “Of course. I would love you to.” His fingers combed gently through my hair. “Why do you feel like you need to ask?”

“Well…” I thought about how to phrase it and then just decided to be plain, my fingertips still moving in lazily circles. “Because usually, you enjoy being in charge. Don’t you?”

I could tell that he was considering his answer as well, fingers still slowly brushing through my hair. “I do. But I also enjoyed you going for what you wanted.”

“Good,” I muttered with a satisfied hum and stored his answer away. I would certainly think more about what else I might want or want to try in the near future. As for now, however…

“Come to think of it, there’s something else I want right now.” I opened my eyes and gave him a broad grin, and he simply laughed.

“Is it food?”

I scowled. “How did you know?!”

That only seemed to send him into another fit of laughter. “My little prince, light of my life, how can I say this…” he seemed to get out between pearls of laughter. “Have you not noticed yet how often you get ravenous after lying with me?”

I tried to give him an indignant look and failed, because his heartfelt laughter was way too infectious. “Aw, come on, you’re just saying that because of that one time I made you go fishing right after,” I prodded his side, although come to think of it, he might have a point. “Fortunately for you, I came prepared today.”

“Mhmm.” Nelyo was still grinning, and gave my backside a light, amiable slap. “Fortunately for me. How about you get you and your clothes sorted while I serve food?”

“Are you saying I’m overdressed?” I grinned, pointedly looking first at Nelyo who was gloriously naked while I was still wearing my shirt and hadn’t bothered to fully remove my breeches from where Nelyo had pushed them down before. Without waiting for his reply, I reached for the hem of my shirt to pull it over my head. “The food is in my bag over there. Oh, and I also brought some wine.”

Of course, as I quickly found out, I was not the only one who had brought food. And I shouldn’t have been surprised, after what he had just revealed to have observed about me.

By the time I had removed the rest of my objectionable clothes and sat down next to him again, there was a thin blanket underneath us and he had spread bread, cheese, honeyed nuts, cherries, little carrot tartes, crumb cake and two wineskins on it. He welcomed me with a kiss to the lips and one of the cakes and I accepted both with utter delight. The cake was sweet and rich and I couldn’t help playfully nibbling on his fingertips as he fed it to me.

“Much better than half-raw fish…”

“Well, you could have _waited_ for it to be done properly before trying to take a bite out of it,” Nelyo smirked while breaking off bread and cheese for himself.

“Fair,” I admitted and comfortably stretched out on the blanket beneath him, putting my head into his lap. With a satisfied sigh, I reached for some cherries and let one of the sweet fruits melt in my mouth. Spitting out the stone, it hit exactly the tree trunk I had been aiming for, which made me feel even more satisfied with the world than I already did. 

Instantly, his fingers brushed over my hair again, and he hummed contentedly above me.

“What about Tirion? Any interesting new developments while we were gone?”

“Oh well, you know Tirion,” I answered with a shrug, lazily dangling another pair of cherries before my eyes and admiring their rich, dark color. “Nothing much. During the rainfalls a few weeks ago, there was some minor water damage in the granary, so grandfather is bargaining with the Vanyar for them to help us with some corn. What else, hmmm… we all think that Nandariel _might_ be with child again. Although right now, it’s just rumours. Oh and -” I rolled my eyes and grinned. “Believe it or not, Turko is courting some nís. Or to be exact, right now it just seems to be an incredible amount of mopey pining.”

Nelyo laughed and leaned over to pull the carrot tartes closer, careful not to jostle me from my position. “Turko in love? I’m not sure I can picture it. Do you know who it is?”

“Of course I would know - Turko made a great show of asking mother’s and father’s approval and now every family meal is filled with lots of talk about our family line and plans for their future home. Her name is Elenwë, she is of the Vanyar, and I am fairly sure that’s all that anybody knows so far. Including Turko, because I believe that up until now, they have talked, like, twice.” 

It wasn’t that I begrudged my brother his happiness. Yet I couldn’t help being sarcastic about it. As long as I could remember, even when we had still been children, Turko had always tried to prove to our parents and especially our father that despite me being the eldest, he was the more responsible and mature son. Assuming that he might be the first of us siblings to marry would of course play right into that. And each time he was prattling about Elenwë, I had to suppress the urge to either let him know that he couldn’t be more wrong or give his shin a good kick under the table. Unfortunately, the former response was out of the question and even I had to admit that the latter would not exactly disprove his presumption regarding our maturity. 

It took me a moment to realize that Nelyo’s reply came belated as well. There was a thoughtful expression on his face when I looked up, but he seemed to catch himself and smiled down at me.

“I’m happy for him. And it is probably a good thing, to have the attention off us for a while, don’t you think?”

“Easy for you to say, you don’t have to listen to his drivel every day,” I growled, picked up another cherry and held it to his lips. He accepted it between his teeth, the corners of his eyes still crinkled in a smile. I softened at the sight, yet continued. “Rissi and I have thought about starting a drinking game in which you have to drink each time he mentions certain words like ‘family’, ‘responsibility’ and ‘marriage’. If a meal is going particularly badly, at least we’ll be dead drunk halfway through.”

Nelyo hummed and chewed, and once he was able to again, he grinned, “Hard to imagine sometimes, that you three are born of the same parents.”

He was right - another ongoing joke between Rissi and me was about our parents having found Turko somewhere as a baby, because there was no way the three of us shared the same blood. Nevertheless, I raised my eyebrows at Nelyo.

“Come on, you’re one to talk. You and your brothers aren’t exactly birds of a feather either.” And with a grin, I added, “At least I have a hard time imagining myself feeding cherries to any of _them_. Mostly for the fact that, save Káno maybe, I wouldn’t be sure to still have fingers if I tried.”

“That’s a fair assessment,” Nelyo laughed, and I didn’t think I could get enough of the sound. I had missed it for too long.

The thought distracted me enough that I was late in realising that when Nelyo leaned over, it was to reach for my bag. What he came back with was my little harp I had brought along - and of course, he must have seen it while preparing our picnic - and he settled it into his arm.

“In a mood for playing?” I asked lightly, feeling oddly shy about him having found the instrument.

“Well, you must have brought it along for a reason,” Nelyo gave me a warm, wry smile. “I figured it might have been because you wanted to hear some music.”

“Well, maybe I just needed a convincing backup plan if my other begetting day present turned out to be a sorry disappointment,” I said with a grin. “Charm you with some romantic tunes instead.”

“Ohh, you want to play for _me_?”

And before I knew it, my harp was being pushed into my hands, along with a way too big grin on my husband’s face. Damn trickster, I should have known. My face suddenly felt way too warm and I idly brushed a few strings to distract myself, the soft tunes lingering in the warm air.

“Something specific you have in mind?” I asked casually, even though I felt my heartbeat quicken and of course he could feel it, too. 

Nelyo was leaning back on his hands, a way too pleased expression on his face. “No, not at all. But I’m thinking that there might be something on _yours_.”

“Do you now,” I echoed, sat up and ran my hands over the strings, playing the first tunes of the melody that had never really left my mind in recent weeks. 

“Know that this is highly experimental, then,” I felt the need to point out. “And… very much still a work in progress.”

He must have felt my nerves, then, because his features softened visibly. “I can’t wait to hear it.”

“As long as you remember I am no Makalaurë…” I muttered. I knew I had a good voice and that I was a halfway decent player, and normally I would have never hesitated when he asked me to play for him. But I had realized that when it came to composing and putting my feelings into song, I felt unusually self-conscious. The fact that Nelyo’s brother probably was the most famous bard in Valinor already did not help at all. 

Nevertheless, I didn’t draw it out any longer, reached for the strings and started to sing the words that I had mused about endlessly in the dead hours of the night, thinking about him and writing and rephrasing the words, never feeling like I did him enough justice.

_Through shadows dark and dreadful fear_

_Throughout the coldest night_

_A fire draws the seeker near_

_Its flame so warm and bright_

_He rushes in, his ardour grows_

_Heat surging through his core_

_And burning fiercely, this he knows_

_He’ll come back wanting more_

My face felt hot when I looked up again, my fingers still caressing the strings in absence of something else to do. “Um. Well. That’s it, for now. It was supposed to be longer, a ballad or something, but I guess it turned out composing is not my strongest suit…”

I did not manage to get out any other word then, as he had grasped my chin and pulled me in to press our lips together in a fervent kiss. And now that I was not solely focused on my nerves and the song anymore, I realized that our bond was thrumming with loving gratitude and amazement. I sighed softly into the kiss, a feeling of relief rushing throughout my body. Of course I would have never expected him to mock me for it, but I did not know if I could have borne the embarrassment if he had merely indulgently smiled at my song, as an adult might smile at the enthusiastic but mediocre work of a child.

Our kiss wore off eventually, but only for Nelyo to tip our foreheads together, his thumb brushing over my cheek.

“I could not love it more if I tried,” he told me, smiled, and stole another peck from my lips. “And if it is indeed a work in progress, I cannot wait to hear the next verses.” There was a slightly mischievous sparkle in his eyes then, that I only understood when he added, “For now, however, do tell me more about that dreadful fear…”

“Artistic liberties to increase the epic weight of the song with vague references to the old songs about Cuiviénen and the darkness of Endórë,” I replied with a wink and then gave him an equally mischievous grin. “More importantly, I was in desperate need of a rhyme for ‘near’. Except for ‘fear’, I could only think of references to ‘my astounding rear’. Which seemed a little inappropriate for a romantic lovesong.”

“Even though it _would_ have been the truth.”

“You flatter me, my lord.” My words sounded more suggestive than coy as I leaned in to steal another kiss from his lips, catching his laugh. His hands were back on my skin, warm and sure as they trailed over my sides and came to rest on my behind as we kissed yet again.

“Deservedly,” he was grinning and pulled me against his chest, and from the hint of a tingling thrill echoing over our bond, I knew exactly where we were heading. “It does not have to be in song,” he murmured then, “but will you share more with me of his growing ardour…?”

“It would be my utmost pleasure,” I muttered and slid into his lap, wrapping my arms around his shoulder. Unable to entirely hide a private grin, I added, “I think when you take a look into my bag again, you might find a vial of sandalwood oil there…”

The passionate kiss he drew me into and the intoxicating feeling of his length pressing hard against my stomach indeed sent the so familiar fiery rush I had sung about through my body. And as always, I mindlessly gave myself over to the feeling, not fearing its burn, as long as he would be there to hold me close.


End file.
